November 21, 1944

Tuesday

Flew missions combat missions on the 15th, 16th and 18th. No missions yet this week. Gun cleaning, flying early and late. Food for the week awful, including C rations, K rations and dehydrated foods such as beets and potatoes. Ugh.

The dreams are back again. Dreamed two vivid ones last night. A snake under my mattress. Woke up in an hysterical condition on all fours clawing to get at the snake. Afterwards, got up and smoked a cigarette. Went back to bed and tossed about. Prayed until sleep came again. Awakened again by clear sound of a shot, pimpled with fear. A muscle contracted in my neck and seemed to snap. Sensation was that I was hit by the bullet. Went back to sleep again with fear still in me. Woke again in a cold sweat. It can’t be the missions because I haven’t flown for two days. It seems to be some nameless horror that bothers me. What it is I do not know. Pray God to help me. Cessation is certainly necessary.

The nights are filled with dread, but the days seems to go their way in serenity. Spent yesterday morning and this morning on sick call with very sore feet. Fungus foot and also fungus in my ear. Slept yesterday afternoon and intend to write letters and go to photography class this afternoon. Stomach is in rough shape. Miserable stomach, feeling almost like pulled muscles do. The food seems to be getting to me to some extent.

Had Lt. Flagg buy two pair of khaki pants from quartermaster for me. Our supply is niggardly when it comes to clothing. Guess they are saving it to return to the States after the war is over. There must be tons of stuff piled up in the doggone place. Oh well!

Now have 43 missions in . Should have my points by Jan 1st with 13 more missions. Am hopeful at any rate.

Time for school now. Adios, W.

Notes & Commentary

It is interesting that he doesn’t attribute his nightmares to the missions he is flying even though some journal entries ago he noted the nights before missions are the worst.

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6 Responses to November 21, 1944

  1. Pierre Lagacé says:

    The real war… and why veterans never talked about it. Who would recall these experiences to people who were not there?

    Like

  2. This broke my heart.

    Like

  3. Sammy D. says:

    I thought the same thing. He writes about days being ‘normsl’ when NOTHING is normal. How could he not suffer terrible nightmares after repressing fears, etc every day and every mission?

    How awful – physically and emotionally there was so much for them to face.

    Like

  4. suchled says:

    A lot of ‘gung ho’ WWll movies have a lot to answer for. There is no glory in any of this other than the sheer guts and determination of the ordinary soldier to see it through.

    Like

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